Lately, I've taken a renewed if somewhat passive interest in our family finances. When Adrian and I were first married, I shouldered the responsibility of managing the budget in Quicken. However, I quickly relented this burden back to Adrian when I became overwhelmed with it. I guess, I've never been very fiscally minded. I mean, when I came home after accepting my first teaching position, Adrian asked how much I'd be making and I had no idea. (In my defense, it wasn't like I was going to get more in one position than another. I would be paid on the state scale.)
However, my interest has once again been peaked. I sincerely want to be aware of how the money is flowing through (or mostly out) of our household. I have a feeling this new desire has most to do with an underlying guilt (as most things in my life do). It's a guilt of not making but definitely spending the money. It is a guilt not put upon me by my dear hubby. He constantly tries to reassure me that I do work and contribute to the household, but since that contribution is not measured monetarily I am left feeling inconsequential. Plus, there's always that nagging feminist in the back of my head screaming, "You're letting a man take care of you?!?!"
I need to get involved I really do. That way, when I'm standing at Target pondering whether I should purchase a new set of pajamas, I can actually make an informed (and not guilt ridden) decision. And that, in the words of the ultimate housewife-cum-corporate icon is a good thing.
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2 comments:
This sounds quite similar to how I feel every day! I also have the joy of knowing that I don't contribute financially, I won't for the next... ? years... and I bring mountains of debt in the form of school loans!
We've been trying to figure out a way to make it work so that I don't feel like I have to ask to go buy a coffee or something - and feel horrible when I do... it's frustrating. Let us know if you find a good system!
So funny how on the same track we are. I just told Bill that I want to sit down and get a handle on our finances and set a budget we can stick to. Becoming a non-income earner has been a TOUGH adjustment for me.
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